A different take on Gas prices!!!

I am in favor of high gas prices. I am sick of hearing people whine about high gas prices. I wish that gas prices were higher. I would like to see gas around $5-6 per gallon. Here are my reasons.

Reason #1- Less cars on the road! High gas prices will stop a certain portion of people from driving. It will force people to use public transportation or ride a bicycle. This may benefit some of those fat and lazy assholes that are always cutting people off. It will keep people with old cars that can’t afford to pass emissions from being able to afford gas as well. This will have the added benefit of cleaner air in our cities. Even those that still could afford to drive would likely drive less and find alternatives when they were available.

Reason #2- It seems like poor people are shitty drivers. They drive crappy cars and they just don’t care. I am always getting cut off by some piece of crap pinto that is blowing black smoke out of the exhaust pipe. In many cases uneducated equals shitty job equals poor pay equals poor person equals shitty driver. High gas prices would take the ability to drive away from the poor and the uneducated. This would be a huge bonus to the safety of our roadways. These people are the same people that think that they can lower gas prices by circulating emails telling people not to buy gas on Tuesdays. OK idiots, so then everyone just gets their gas on Mondays or Wednesdays instead!?!? The same amount of money will be spent throughout the week anyways. Even though it makes no difference I always make sure to buy some gas on one of those boycott days whether I need it or not.

Reason #3- Let’s punish those jackasses that buy an SUV the size of three highway lanes. If you want to drive a car that gets 3 miles to the gallon so that you can look like your favorite rap star, then that is fine. But you will have to get a second job to be able to afford it. Less SUVs means a cleaner environment.

Reason #4- If gas prices get high enough and enough people seriously can’t afford to buy gas then we will be forced to look for alternative energy sources. If we are not getting all of our energy from other countries then there will be no need for us to send out troops to those countries to be involved in their affairs.

Reason #5- Because driving and low gas prices are not your right. All of you red blooded American rednecks out there need to understand that this is a world economy now. We are not self sufficient. If the stock market takes a dive in china, then we get affected. If there is a problem with oil production, supply and demand will shoot up the price. So you have some options. Buy a more fuel efficient car, ride a bike, take public transportation. Your hard work and intelligence put you in the place that you are currently at in life. You made it happen, it did not happen to you. If you find that you cannot afford to do certain things that you want to do, then you either need to get a second job, get a better job, or shut the fuck up and accept your lot in life to be mediocre.

I have absolutely no issues with paying extra for the “privilege” of driving. In fact I think that this spike in gas prices is long overdue. You do not get to have everything in life handed to you. It takes away from those of us who have busted our asses our whole life to get to where we are. Your time is over, ours have come, and gas prices are just the start.